Celebrating Mother's Day: 15 Lessons I Learned From My Mom

Happy Mother’s Day!

In the spirit of Mother's Day, I wanted to dedicate this blog to my mom, Emily Williams.  I've been fortunate enough to meet a lot of incredible people—especially women!— throughout my life, but my mother was one of a kind, and she had a profound and lasting impact on me.

My mother had a tough life.  She was born in Mississippi in the 1920s, where she faced unrelenting racism.  She contracted polio when she was 10 years old, and was paralyzed for two whole years.  The doctors said she would never walk again.  By age 12, she had retaught herself how to walk.

My mother was the only one in her family to graduate from high school, and after my siblings and I were grownups, she went back to college.  My father left us in the late 50s, so she raised multiple kids on her own.  She was the bravest, most resilient woman I've ever known, and even though she passed some time ago, I miss her every day.  She was my best friend.

Here are 15 of the many lessons I learned from my mother that have stayed with me to this day.

1. You are special.

My mother never forgot to remind me and my siblings that we were special.  We mattered in the world, because we mattered to her.  This reminder did so much for my self-confidence.

2. You can be whatever and whoever you want to be.

My mother never tried to push me into a mold or force me to take a certain path.  She encouraged me and my passions throughout my life.  She let me figure it out.

3. All you can do is your best.

My mom had high expectations for me, but as long as I did my best, she was happy.  She taught me that my biggest competition should be myself, and that I should be proud of what I accomplish.

4. It's not all about you.

My mother was always quick to remind me that the world didn't revolve around me.  The world wasn't out to get me; sometimes things just happen.

5. Don't dwell on the past.

My mom was a big proponent of the idea that it's okay to be stuck, but you don't have to stay stuck.  She encouraged me to not dwell on the past, and to keep moving forward.

6. Spend time outside every day.

Fresh air and a nice walk were what my mom always recommended when I was feeling down or antsy.  She didn't want me to sit inside and waste the day.  She told me to get out there and enjoy it.

7. Take your time.

Haste makes waste, as they say.  My mom often urged me to take my time, whether I was working on a task or learning a new skill.  There was no need to rush.

8. Treat everyone with respect and empathy.

My mother's view on this was clear:  Every person on this planet deserves respect and empathy.  “Do unto others as you would have them do unto you.”  We are all human.

9. Lead by example.

If you can be a role model for others, be one!  Be the kind of friend you would be happy to have.  Be the bigger person and admit when you're wrong.

10. Do what makes you happy.

Above all, my mother wanted me to be happy.  She prioritized my happiness and was there for me every step of the way.  Her measure of a good life was happiness, and she believed that we all make our own happiness.

11. What doesn't kill you makes you stronger.

This lesson has stuck with me, and really proven itself true this past year.  Every experience, even the painful ones, helps us grow and become stronger.

12. Always be financially independent.

As a fellow woman, my mother always taught me to have my own money and be able to support myself.  That way, no matter what happened, I'd be okay.

13. Don't withhold apologies.

When you do something wrong or hurt someone, she said, say you're sorry—and mean it.  There is no pride in withholding necessary apologies.

14. Try new things, you might like them.

Whether it was food, movies, or activities, my mom constantly pushed me to try things outside of my comfort zone.  You don't know what you like until you try it, she would say.

15. Real love is unconditional.

My mother knew that love is complicated, but the truest love is unconditional.  She loved me more than anyone in the world could, and she made sure I knew it.

We all have mothers—and many of us are mothers—so I hope you can take this Mother's Day to celebrate all of the women and mothers in your life.  And to my own mom:  Thank you for everything you taught me.  I love you so much and I miss you terribly.

What lessons have your mother taught you? We’d love to hear them in the comments, and if you want to join a badass supportive group of women who can help you achieve your goals – join our private community, the Pure Joy Squad here! 

XO,

Renata