How Worrying About Your Age Could Be Holding You Back

I turned 65 a mere four months ago—an age that a lot of women dread. Despite all the preconceived notions of how I thought I would feel about it, I have to admit, I feel better than ever! That might sound like I am just saying some feel good bullshit, but I promise it’s the truth. 

I have worried about my age at certain points in the past, many years ago. Now, I rarely think about age unless someone else brings it up. A recent conversation got me thinking a lot about how much people—particularly women—worry about their age, and how much that can hold you back from being as happy as possible. Not only that, it can hold you back from moments of pure joy and bliss because you talk yourself out of something you genuinely want to do, thinking, “Hmmm, I might be too old for that.”

Now is a perfect time to discard that line of thinking, and here’s why. The notion of “being too old for something” is just a story that people tell themselves. And when you define yourself by your age, it becomes an excuse to not push yourself out of your comfort zone. But the only way to grow stronger and improve your life, both mentally and physically, is to step outside that comfort zone—to go for it, and see what happens. 

This might surprise you to hear, but I was 46 years old when I had the idea to start Pure Joy Wellness. That was back when “age” was still a thing for me so I thought, “I might be too old to do this now.” I started thinking about leaving the supposed comfort and security of my corporate job. I was a producer for a hit television show at a large network and I was worried about stepping out on my own even though I really wanted to do it. Obviously, I scraped my doubts. I put my age on the back burner and moved forward because I really wanted to help women. Now I think: What if I had allowed my age to hold me back? Where would I be, and where would the women I’ve worked with be? Just let that sink in for a moment. Not only are you holding yourself back by letting your age stop you from doing certain things—you may also be holding someone else back who would have been directly helped by you or simply inspired by your example. (This irony for me is that my age has turned out to be a big asset in my business!)

To change your thoughts and actions around age, try letting yourself go and tapping into your inner child. Children don’t worry that they’re a particular age. They don’t even think about it. They just say, “Hey, my brother is climbing up that jungle gym and that looks fun. I want to do it too.” Never mind the fact that they are three and their brother is six. Who were you before you started to worry about your age? What did that person aspire to do? 

Reinventing ourselves can and should happen at any age. In fact, among my clients and many of the people I see on the wellness circuit around New York City, I am noticing a trend: Some of the healthiest people in training and classes are in their 50s and 60s. The reality is, midlife has changed. People who are over 50, who are not thinking about age as a limitation, are crushing it.

Mary Kay Ash, one of the wealthiest and most successful American businesswomen ever, said: “Aerodynamically, the bumble bee shouldn’t be able to fly, but the bumblebee doesn’t know that, so it goes on flying anyway.”

Moral of the story: Forget your age. Spread your wings. Fly.

xo, 

Renata